CAN WE HAVE IT ALL

Some say why can't we have it all.  Why can't we have a family a career and or a business!   Why are we made to feel guilty about the decisions we make especially if they include wanting to be successful.  As a business owner I know it's hard enough to run a business and try to be a full time stay at home mom or working mom and your business be successful.  We can try and juggle it all but from experience and seeing other women something WILL be sacrificed.  As hard as we try and juggle and multi task something always seems to fall by the wayside.  And sometimes women decide to sacrifice not even having a family at all. 

There are some things we don’t get to do over in life and one of them is being a parent. If you decide to be a stay at home mom or a working mom is all a personal choice. These days society has made it that you cannot survive if you have a family off a one person income or the struggle will really be on.  Just look at a lot of the single mothers trying to do it all on there own.  This leaves your child alone a lot of times you have to put you child in daycare, get a nanny etc and let some one else fill the gap and help raise you child and that to can be expensive. The question sometimes is can we trust these people that watch and take care of our children? Besides no one can care for our children the way we can. That’s where the frustration comes in for some of us. You want to be at home with your child but at the same time you need the money to take care of them. So what do you do? How did they do it back in the day with all those kids and so few resources? Well most of them trusted God to be there provider. He is the source and everything else is a resource. So why can’t we trust HIM now? Everything is expensive and bottom line is we always want bigger, better and MORE.

There are a lot of demands on a working mom. Our role was always to be home centered first but some how we got off of that. Yes you can have a family and a job, career, business and be every woman but the pressures are made that you give more to your job than you do home.  Something always seems to lack and unfortunately its normally home. A job can come and go but your family, and kids will always be there. You go to work, which is your second job and then come home and go to your first job and really when you are at work you still are on your first job because being a mom is a 24 hour job. Will they call you and tell you your child is sick, you call and make appointments, you do everything because this child is depending on your for everything. So the demand of home is high, the demand of your job is high, now you getting frustrated. You are snappy at your husband or anyone else around, you become short tempered, your stressed and then you ask, when am I going to have time for myself? This becomes one of those Calgon take me away moments. So what do you do? Lets evaluate this.

You are getting pulled in so many different directions, you are stressed then the negative vibes ware off when you come home on your kids or mate and you snap at them and pop them because your patience is just gone.  Men will never understand the demands and challenges of being a mom and why because they were not made to fulfill that role which is the same reason why they were not made to carry the children. Were you ever amazed at how we can easily just transition into the role of being a mother? The making bottles, caring for them, making sure they have everything they need, being the chauffeur, the on call nurse, the everything, and the joy just comes in when you get that smile form your child or that pat on the leg and they say momma, the hugs or just a laugh uncontrollably when you play with them or chase them. That’s where the guilt comes in. You are so tired from work that you miss out on a lot of this because you don’t have the energy to now come home and play and do homework and cook dinner and get ready to do the same thing tomorrow. You already feel bad you have to go back to work and let some one else raise them and have those moments. You miss the first walk, the fall downs and having some one else tell them its going to be ok and kiss the boo boo and make it feel better. All moments we cannot get back and all moments we think about while we are at work staring at a picture of them or just thinking about what they are doing. And then we wonder how they grow up so fast because we missed most of it being at work trying to provide for needs and some greeds and you try to sneak in a sick or a slick day every now and then to try and make up time but once its gone you can never get it back.

So can we have it all? You may be one of the blessed few who can have the best of both worlds both at home working taking care of business and taking care of your kids. I have been on both sides and eventually you will have to make a choice of which will come first.  I am fortunate to say I do have it all but my kids will always come first in everything I seek to do.